Ever keep a secret that is SO BIG you almost can't contain it? Well, that's been us LITERALLY for several weeks!! Unfortunately, our secret is soon to become NOTICEABLY NOT a secret!!
So, here goes : we're expecting!! Due October 30, 2005. Our kiddos will be nearly 21 months apart! We have had 2 DR visits and 2 sonograms! We have another sonogram on April 8th where she will get a more accurate EDD.
Since this pregnancy was most definitely a SURPRISE we are having to adjust quickly. However, we are in a battle to convince ourselves that everything is for a reason and we'll all be FINE. I just wish I had a different job. I dislike retail work anyway, but it's super difficult when pregnant. Especially what I am doing. Unfortunately, I cannot start nursing school or paramedic training until I'm no longer pregnant. Ah well, such is life.
I will update more later, but for now I should go play with my son. He is patiently playing with his toys and watching "Finding Nemo." What a precious gift he is.
Thursday, March 31, 2005
Saturday, March 26, 2005
Tomorrow is Easter
I read back through what I wrote last night. WHEW it makes sense. I guess what I was trying to say was that Easter and Christmas pack a Church. Businesses are closed (out of respect, I guess) but the Company I work for is open tomorrow. The MALL stores are closed, but strip mall stores are OPEN. I think THAT is stupid. It means that people are stuck working on Easter, one of the most important Holidays. To me, it is THE most important Holiday.
I hestitate to say that Easter is my "favorite" Holiday because it is such a sad Holiday. I think the commercialization of Easter bothers me a TON more than does the commercialization of Christmas. You see, Christ's death and Resurrection has NOTHING to do with a rabbit that delivers and hides eggs. I have never really understood where it came from, other than rabbits and chickens are springtime creatures. But rabbits do not lay eggs (at least they didn't when I was studying Biology). I have heard it explained that the eggs symbolize NEW BIRTH/NEW LIFE. But how many people explain that to their children? WE will explain to our children that easter egg hunts are fun but they are NOT the reason for the Holiday. We will explain to our children that GOD sent his only son to die for all of our sins so we can be in Heaven with Him again one day. And on Easter we celebrate HIS re-birth. His Resurrection. THAT is what we will teach our children about Easter.
Same goes for Christmas. The TRUE meaning will always be on our hearts and minds during that time of the year. In fact, we already started our tradition of buying something for someone less fortunate than we are. This is something I will do every year with my kids and something I hope they will continue to do when they are adults.
I am a firm believer in establishing TRADITIONS. FIRM TRADITIONS. I LOVE having a routine and I love things being organized. Though you'd never be able to tell by my house. It bothers me that I am not able to get my house organized the way I would like. I am seriously debating taking a solid week off of work and doing nothing but cleaning and organizing and throwing things away. I say that now, but I don't see it happening. But, now that I've written it down I CAN make it happen. In fact, maybe I'll just take the week of the 3rd off and clean my house. Do you think I can do it? I think I can! I think I can! I think I can!
The hardest part is going to be getting off of work for a whole week! But I think I can convince them I need the time. Who knows....all I can do is try, right?
Isn't it lucky that I have been able to be here all day with Daniel? Isn't it lucky that he has become incredibly easy to get to bed? Isn't it lucky that I now have a 13 month old son who sleeps through the night 11-12 hours at a time?!?! I miss those early morning times with him so much! When he was waking up so much during the night up until a few weeks ago, I thought he would NEVER sleep through the night. (And to be honest, I was kind of glad.) But here he is, sleeping peacefully after going to bed and I know that I can count on him STAYING asleep for hours to come. It never fails to amaze me how incredible he truly is.
I look at him and I marvel at how perfect he is. I love the sound he makes when I blow air on his tummy. I love the color of his eyes and I wouldn't change them for all the world. I love the way his little Drake's tail curls up at the nape of his neck (it seems to be crying out "don't cut me mommy, let my curls grow and grow!" but I know his daddy won't let me). I adore his little nose and the sweet way his heart shaped mouth purses when he's sleeping. It's all that I can do not to kiss and kiss and kiss him and wake him up. But I refrain. Well, almost. I do gently kiss his forehead, then that sweet nose, and finally that precious little mouth. Is there anything in the universe as precious or as sweet as a baby that has just fallen asleep?
The best is when he falls asleep peacefully, with no fussing. Like he did tonight. Well, I take that back. This morning when he went down for his nap was pretty awesome. We snuggled under his blankie and I rocked him with his head on my left shoulder. He was looking up at me -- so trusting, so innocent, so pure. He was getting sleepier and sleepier with each forward and backward motion. His eyelids were so heavy, but he struggled to keep them open and fixed on my face. Then he began to smile and a soft low giggle emerged from his throat. He closed his eyes and continued to giggle gently. Up came his left index finger. He began gently sucking his finger as he continued his sweet little sound. He let out a tiny sigh of sheer contentment and his finger fell from his mouth. His mouth remained open, as though his finger were still in there, and his breathing became deeper. I could feel warmth and security emanating from every pore of his body. It is in moments like those that I want to hold him forever. But I didn't. I heeded the experts and placed him in his crib. He rolled onto his tummy with his bobo in the air, and his head turned to the left. I covered him gently with his blankie so his feet would not get cold (even though I know that blankie was gone the first time he moved an inch). He slept for over 2 hours, so falling asleep that way must have been just as awesome for him as it was for me.
Isn't it lucky.
I hestitate to say that Easter is my "favorite" Holiday because it is such a sad Holiday. I think the commercialization of Easter bothers me a TON more than does the commercialization of Christmas. You see, Christ's death and Resurrection has NOTHING to do with a rabbit that delivers and hides eggs. I have never really understood where it came from, other than rabbits and chickens are springtime creatures. But rabbits do not lay eggs (at least they didn't when I was studying Biology). I have heard it explained that the eggs symbolize NEW BIRTH/NEW LIFE. But how many people explain that to their children? WE will explain to our children that easter egg hunts are fun but they are NOT the reason for the Holiday. We will explain to our children that GOD sent his only son to die for all of our sins so we can be in Heaven with Him again one day. And on Easter we celebrate HIS re-birth. His Resurrection. THAT is what we will teach our children about Easter.
Same goes for Christmas. The TRUE meaning will always be on our hearts and minds during that time of the year. In fact, we already started our tradition of buying something for someone less fortunate than we are. This is something I will do every year with my kids and something I hope they will continue to do when they are adults.
I am a firm believer in establishing TRADITIONS. FIRM TRADITIONS. I LOVE having a routine and I love things being organized. Though you'd never be able to tell by my house. It bothers me that I am not able to get my house organized the way I would like. I am seriously debating taking a solid week off of work and doing nothing but cleaning and organizing and throwing things away. I say that now, but I don't see it happening. But, now that I've written it down I CAN make it happen. In fact, maybe I'll just take the week of the 3rd off and clean my house. Do you think I can do it? I think I can! I think I can! I think I can!
The hardest part is going to be getting off of work for a whole week! But I think I can convince them I need the time. Who knows....all I can do is try, right?
Isn't it lucky that I have been able to be here all day with Daniel? Isn't it lucky that he has become incredibly easy to get to bed? Isn't it lucky that I now have a 13 month old son who sleeps through the night 11-12 hours at a time?!?! I miss those early morning times with him so much! When he was waking up so much during the night up until a few weeks ago, I thought he would NEVER sleep through the night. (And to be honest, I was kind of glad.) But here he is, sleeping peacefully after going to bed and I know that I can count on him STAYING asleep for hours to come. It never fails to amaze me how incredible he truly is.
I look at him and I marvel at how perfect he is. I love the sound he makes when I blow air on his tummy. I love the color of his eyes and I wouldn't change them for all the world. I love the way his little Drake's tail curls up at the nape of his neck (it seems to be crying out "don't cut me mommy, let my curls grow and grow!" but I know his daddy won't let me). I adore his little nose and the sweet way his heart shaped mouth purses when he's sleeping. It's all that I can do not to kiss and kiss and kiss him and wake him up. But I refrain. Well, almost. I do gently kiss his forehead, then that sweet nose, and finally that precious little mouth. Is there anything in the universe as precious or as sweet as a baby that has just fallen asleep?
The best is when he falls asleep peacefully, with no fussing. Like he did tonight. Well, I take that back. This morning when he went down for his nap was pretty awesome. We snuggled under his blankie and I rocked him with his head on my left shoulder. He was looking up at me -- so trusting, so innocent, so pure. He was getting sleepier and sleepier with each forward and backward motion. His eyelids were so heavy, but he struggled to keep them open and fixed on my face. Then he began to smile and a soft low giggle emerged from his throat. He closed his eyes and continued to giggle gently. Up came his left index finger. He began gently sucking his finger as he continued his sweet little sound. He let out a tiny sigh of sheer contentment and his finger fell from his mouth. His mouth remained open, as though his finger were still in there, and his breathing became deeper. I could feel warmth and security emanating from every pore of his body. It is in moments like those that I want to hold him forever. But I didn't. I heeded the experts and placed him in his crib. He rolled onto his tummy with his bobo in the air, and his head turned to the left. I covered him gently with his blankie so his feet would not get cold (even though I know that blankie was gone the first time he moved an inch). He slept for over 2 hours, so falling asleep that way must have been just as awesome for him as it was for me.
Isn't it lucky.
Friday, March 25, 2005
Is there anything sweeter in the whole wide world?
Babies sleeping are the epitome of innocence. How blissful does he look? I wonder if I look that peaceful when I sleep at night? This was taken during a VERY LONG nap last week. Normally, he sleeps on his tummy but for some reason he was on his back. I had lowered the drop side to get a better angle at the photo. I cannot believe he didn't wake up instantly, but he didn't! He is my joy.I have not blogged here in quite some time but I will try to do better in the future
As I sat here today thinking about how BLESSED I truly am, I began to reflect on the meaning of life. I think I have finally come up with an answer I am satisfied with. The meaning of life is simple : to live. But it is all in HOW you live. You can choose to live your life in any number of ways. You can choose the self-made path of human failings OR you can choose the GOD-led path of Righteousness. They both have certain endings. You just might not like where the one road leads you. Oh sure, the destination may be more exciting on the one road, but honestly when I think about it : I'd rather suffer the slings and arrows and KNOW I'm going to end up in a better place than enjoy it while I've got it.
Maybe that doesn't make any sense to anyone but me. Oh well, all I can say is that I understand what I am saying, and it all makes PERFECT sense to me!
I have also discovered that I am in desperate need of a computer that is NOT a laptop. Sure, the laptop is phenomenal and portable but it has a short in the power source which causes it to not recognize that it is plugged in. You have to grit your teeth, roll your eyes, and breathe JUST SO for the power source to be recognized. It is a teensy bit frustrating.
Daniel is walking. How scary is that? Well, not WALKING exactly, but he can -- he's taken steps by himself and today he let go ON PURPOSE and walked 5 steps to me. Isn't it lucky that I get to spend these kinds of days with him?
As Easter nears I find myself thinking about God's Sacrifice MORE AND MORE. I realize that as much as I love Daniel (so much it feels as though my heart will explode) GOD loves me EVEN MORE. I mean, sure there are people I love a whole bunch and would do ANYTHING FOR, but the sheer thought of sacrificing my SON for someone who might never want anything to do with me makes me sick to my stomach. I guess that is why HE is God, and I am not.
I also know that Easter Sunday will be packed at Church. I've never really understood the mentality of the twice a year church-goer. I mean, does it "God you up" if you go twice a year? Is that all some people need to re-charge their batteries?? I don't mean to be judgemental, but it's hard for me to imagine being able to function if I didn't attend Church on a regular basis. I KNOW my batteries would drain completely, they do when I have to miss a few weeks in a row! I am happy that people find their way into a Church at all, but I just wish it would stick. Who knows, maybe this time it will.
The LORD works in mysterious ways. I keep telling myself that. I also keep telling myself that if I am going to walk down the GOD-led path of life then SOMETIMES I'm going to have to let Him carry me. When it gets rough and I don't think I can handle it any more, or when life throws me a curveball it's HARD not to just sit by the side of the road and say "I QUIT." That's when I have to remember that I have friends who are on this journey with me, and I can always turn to them for support. If nothing else, maybe someone has one of those little pack thingys from India and they can carry me in it for a few miles? What do you think?
It's been a long week, but isn't it lucky that I have gotten to spend this week with my beautiful husband and my even MORE beautiful son?
And isn't it wonderful that Bebe came through her surgery with flying colors?
And isn't it wonderful that the DRs expect her to have a full recovery? Sure, she'll never be quite the same but at least she'll be with us for a long time to come!
And isn't it lucky that I live in a country and a world that ALLOWS me to worship my LORD AND SAVIOUR??
Maybe that doesn't make any sense to anyone but me. Oh well, all I can say is that I understand what I am saying, and it all makes PERFECT sense to me!
I have also discovered that I am in desperate need of a computer that is NOT a laptop. Sure, the laptop is phenomenal and portable but it has a short in the power source which causes it to not recognize that it is plugged in. You have to grit your teeth, roll your eyes, and breathe JUST SO for the power source to be recognized. It is a teensy bit frustrating.
Daniel is walking. How scary is that? Well, not WALKING exactly, but he can -- he's taken steps by himself and today he let go ON PURPOSE and walked 5 steps to me. Isn't it lucky that I get to spend these kinds of days with him?
As Easter nears I find myself thinking about God's Sacrifice MORE AND MORE. I realize that as much as I love Daniel (so much it feels as though my heart will explode) GOD loves me EVEN MORE. I mean, sure there are people I love a whole bunch and would do ANYTHING FOR, but the sheer thought of sacrificing my SON for someone who might never want anything to do with me makes me sick to my stomach. I guess that is why HE is God, and I am not.
I also know that Easter Sunday will be packed at Church. I've never really understood the mentality of the twice a year church-goer. I mean, does it "God you up" if you go twice a year? Is that all some people need to re-charge their batteries?? I don't mean to be judgemental, but it's hard for me to imagine being able to function if I didn't attend Church on a regular basis. I KNOW my batteries would drain completely, they do when I have to miss a few weeks in a row! I am happy that people find their way into a Church at all, but I just wish it would stick. Who knows, maybe this time it will.
The LORD works in mysterious ways. I keep telling myself that. I also keep telling myself that if I am going to walk down the GOD-led path of life then SOMETIMES I'm going to have to let Him carry me. When it gets rough and I don't think I can handle it any more, or when life throws me a curveball it's HARD not to just sit by the side of the road and say "I QUIT." That's when I have to remember that I have friends who are on this journey with me, and I can always turn to them for support. If nothing else, maybe someone has one of those little pack thingys from India and they can carry me in it for a few miles? What do you think?
It's been a long week, but isn't it lucky that I have gotten to spend this week with my beautiful husband and my even MORE beautiful son?
And isn't it wonderful that Bebe came through her surgery with flying colors?
And isn't it wonderful that the DRs expect her to have a full recovery? Sure, she'll never be quite the same but at least she'll be with us for a long time to come!
And isn't it lucky that I live in a country and a world that ALLOWS me to worship my LORD AND SAVIOUR??
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