Memaw

Today is officially one of the worst ever. My Memaw told me today that she has to have an Electrophysiology Study done on her heart on Tuesday. To make matters worse, the DR that is doing it said he’s fairly certain she’ll need to have a pacemaker installed. The good news, since every cloud MUST have a silver lining, is that he told her it’s lucky they caught this early. He said usually this sort of thing is caught in the ER when a patient has to have an emergency pacemaker installed. So yeah, I suppose we could call that good news. But I’m writing this to ask for prayers for her. She always acts as though things are OK when everyone around her knows different. And of course, her first thought was not of herself but of me and my family. She wondered how we were going to be able to have the kids taken care of if she had the procedure done, with me only having 3 weeks of school left. She also seemed more concerned about being able to help out with them and watching them when I start work than she was about herself and the complications she could face. I don’t know that I’ve ever known anyone more selfless and giving than her. She has put her heart and soul into my family this year, and she’s gone way above and beyond anything anyone could ever expect or ask anyone to do. I cannot help but feel that her worsening cardiac status is somehow my fault. She’s been put under so much stress and strain this year, and it’s all my fault. Well, not ALL my fault…there is at least one other person to blame for a lot of stress, but that’s another story and a different blog. She’s taken care of our kids at least two days a week, and usually more like 3 while I’m at school and Michael is at work. She’s very rarely complained. And she works like a dog when she’s here – she’s constantly cleaning this or straightening that or even washing something. Good grief, it’s like having our own personal maid. And the thing is : I LOVE that she does it, but I HATE it too. She drives me nuts because she won’t just sit there and do nothing but watch the kids play. She tells me she feels like something needs to be done and she’s going to do it. I can’t fault her for it, it’s just her nature. I hope that if she does have to have a pacemaker installed, that the procedure goes smoothly and she has no complications. She sure could use all the prayers you can give right now. And so could I. I’m thankful for family and friends to help us through this right now. Everything happens Tuesday December 5th at 7 am. Yeah, that’s the day after my 27th birthday…gee willikers I’m getting old. But again, a different story for a different blog. Thanks for the prayers y’all, they mean the world to us.