Greatest Invention known to man???

Or at least to folks with hard floors and no carpet. Presenting....da da da DA!

The Hoover Floor Mate Hard Floor Cleaner (aka Spin Scrub 800). It was a Birthday present from my gorgeous one, and miraculously I just now today got to use it. Figures, huh? But my floors are absolutely gleaming! What an incredible machine....it vacuums hard floors, then you empty that and you fill the cleaning reservoir. It then washes your floors, and DRIES them, too. Quite possibly one of the coolest gifts I've ever received (this Birthday was the kickin-est one since I was a kid...I got the Floor Mate AND a new dishwasher!)

How you know you're getting old (aka "growing up") :

You get all hot and bothered by household appliances.

It never ends....

We have to study every night....we have quizzes every day....we have lots of reading to do....and we're learning so much.

I had BLS (used to be known as CPR) training today. My goal is to become a CPR Instructor. It's fascinating, boring, and interesting. The addition of the new AEDs (Automated External Defibrillators) had made CPR and saving lives foolproof and more effective.

I have an exam on Monday. We start A & P on Tuesday....this is going to be tremendously exciting.

And I think I am getting better at Blood Pressures. At the end of 3 months (Level I) of Nursing School, I will be eligible to take the CNA exam and become Certified. I could get a job at a hospital as a CNA (Certified Nurse Assistant) working PRN (as needed) one day a week to help out with some financial support, as well as gaining life experience. It would also be a foot in the door at a Hospital for when I'm licensed as a nurse. It all boils down to :

NEEDING 62 HOURS IN A DAY....

Learning at different stages of the game...

I watch my kids, and I see two distinct stages of learning. Zoe is still sort of a newborn, but she's taking in her world and learning that certain things she does makes other things happen. For example : she is learning that if she cries just right, she can make someone pick her up. Well, I don't really know if she's learning that, but that's what happens! She is also learning faces, voices, and smells. I know she's known me since birth (well, since shortly after birth), but she's learning other people now. She smiles, laughs, and she is super ticklish!!

Daniel....he's Mr. Independent....wants to feed himself with no help from anyone. And he's becoming Mr. Picky Eater. He never used to be picky, and some days are better than others, but still : we're trying to teach him that if he doesn't like what's on the menu, tough cookies....he'll eat it anyway or he won't eat at all. I suppose he won't starve.

Me.....adult learning is difficult. Not having had to learn anything new for several years makes it even more difficult. But I'm enjoying the challenge, and I guess it's paying off....I think I'm tops in the class. Not totally sure of that, but pretty close to certain. Now if I can only stay there....

Check the family pics later, I'll be adding some tonight.

Aced It!

I got a 100 on my math exam today! That, I can honestly say, has never happened to me before! We haven't found out the grade for our first exam that we took this morning at 8, but we'll find out tomorrow. I'm just hoping for an A!

No homework today, just practicing vital signs. If you want to know your blood pressure, just find me! :)

The nicest thing anyone's ever done for me....

What is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for you? Because I can't narrow it down to just one, so many people over the years have done so much for me that it's unreal. Totally unbelievable. But I'd like to hear about you!

So, what is it? No fair reading and not answering you know!

Two Exams....

Well we really do jump right in with both feet....I have two major grade exams on Monday. We're talking about 75% of our final grade happening with our major exams. I'm off the charts (in my own humble opinion) on daily grades in both halves of school. I've made 100 on all quizzes in both classes for the last two days straight. Sweet. I feel much more comfortable with what they want me to learn, which makes me happy. There is a ton of studying, but luckily I get it done between 11-1 when I'm off school.

My theory on studying is this : If I had a good teacher, I should retain what they teach me. In a setting like this (Vocational Learning) what I'm learning is all vital, which means there is nothing "extra" or "useless," which a lot of things in "normal college" are. So, I'm only going to spend 1 hour a day or maybe just a little more through Monday morning studying, and that is basically just learning the facts that are to be regurgitated. All the applications to nursing? I'm good with those. And I'm good on so many levels.

Wow, I think my head is already getting too big to fit through doors. It's nice to understand what is going into my brain, and be able to apply it to every day existence.

For example : we're learning math, which I normally abhor. Guess what? I'm the best in class w/this math. I LOVE this math....why? Because it's practical. It's something I will use every day in my career. So, I have an Exam at 8am over : Evolution of Nursing, Communication, and the Nursing Process. At 1 pm my exam is pure math. I have an opportunity to do something I've never done before : ace a major grade math exam.

The other cool thing? I get to learn to take and assess vital signs starting Monday. Yee Haw.

Someday, I could be your nurse!

Spitting in the face of God

Why do we do it? As humans, do we feel some sort of need to thank God for His Goodness by spitting on it? Please, allow me to explain, drawing from my own recent history.

God has given me everything I ever dreamed of, everything I ever wanted. I have a husband who loves me unconditionally and who I adore. I have two gorgeous children, one boy and one girl. I have a house, food, transportation. I have two women in my life who I am proud to call my "-mothers:" my Mom and my Memaw. I have just started the most grueling year of my life, with my family's support, I might add. So what do I do? Stupid things that could jeopardize everything. Idiotic things that tell God maybe He shouldn't trust me anymore. Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and hated what you saw there? I have. About five minutes ago.

Giving my life over to God, saying "Jesus take the wheel," is harder than it seems. But it's what I absolutely must do if I hope to stop the cycle.

Nursing School is.....

AWESOME!! Today was my second day.....it's difficult to get up in the morning at 6:15, unless Zoe is awake already. But when I get to put my scrubs on, I feel so awesome. I get to School, and I sit for 4 hours in a lecture about Nursing Theory. I try to be a sponge, and soak it all up. We have an hour lunch from 12-1 and then we have a 4 hour skills lab -- this is where we practice what we are learning. So far we've learned how to wash our hands (harder than you'd think) and how to put on sterile gloves (super difficult). We have also learned that just about everything the nurses I've encountered have done has been wrong. Amazing, huh?

I have more homework than I've ever had before in my life. Or maybe it's just because the homework is due the next day, where at TCU it was due every other day. All I know is : I'm loving it. Had my first quiz today, it was open book thank goodness! My Teacher is awesome : Ms. Mitchell....she's an inspirational jazz singer in addition to more than 20 years of clinical nursing experience (mostly at JPS). She's amazing : easy to listen to, easy to pay attention to, and she goes out of her way to make everyone feel : important and loved. It's great.

Stopped at Chipotle to get dinner tonight : the manager asked me how my day was, and if what I do is hard. I told him "You have NO IDEA." He laughed. It was great.

Pre-School Jitters....

No, this isn't a post about Daniel starting Pre-School.....trust me, there will be one of those sooner than I'd like! No, this is a post about me going back to school to pursue a nursing dream.

I start tomorrow. Concorde Career Institute, formerly Extended Health Education. I'm excited. I'm nervous. I am looking forward to tomorrow being "The First Day of The Rest of My Life." I'm excited to be finally doing something productive to help my family financially. I'm thrilled that I'll finally be doing something "real" with my life. I can't wait to make a daily difference in the lives of people I work with and work for. I'm also excited to fulfill a life-long ambition to work in the Medical field. Being a nurse is something I've always come back to, ever since I didn't score high enough on my practice MCAT to get accepted to a "good" Medical School. Not to mention, I couldn't get the Organic Chemistry grades that I needed. Ah well.....obviously God had a different plan for my life.

It feels weird. Following God's Plan feels strange. Not necessarily in a bad way, but just different. While it feels like I'm skydiving without a parachute, in reality I'm just jumping off a building into the largest and softest mattress imagineable. I'm going to land on something amazing, I already know it. But it's scary. I don't know why, but "Letting Go and Letting God" is difficult. Guess that's because I'm a HUGE control freak. But, knowing that someone much more capable is in control is comforting.

So, here goes ..... who knows ..... a year from now, when I'm ready to graduate and start my career, how exciting that will be! HOORAY!!

I bet you $500 I can't sleep tonight. You know how before a big day you can't sleep? I was always that way before trips, before starting school, you name it. ESPECIALLY the night before my wedding! And the night before I was scheduled to be induced with Daniel. And the night before my scheduled c-section with Zoe. I couldn't sleep. Too much on my mind, too much to look forward to. Same with tonight.

I hear we hit the ground running tomorrow! I'll be sure to post a picture of me in my uniform for you to admire :) Another life-long dream achieved : wearing scrubs everyday....TO WORK! :)

A Very Good Point

Danny brought up a good point yesterday in a comment he left. It was a joke, but it's something I've heard a LOT...."What exactly do you do all day, since you're at home?" This question, when asked seriously, kind of makes me mad. For two reasons : 1. I'm a HORRIBLE housekeeper, but dang it I TRY. 2. WHAT time??? Normally the people who ask this either a) don't have children, or b) are super moms....and/or have housekeepers. I envy the moms I know who have more than one child and still manage to keep their houses clean, laundry put away, and toys put up. You know the type : you can surprise them at their house, and it still looks like it could be photographed for "House Beautiful." They have two kids, 18 months apart and both still in diapers....or, even more annoying : their oldest child (who just so happens to be a boy) is already potty trained, and he's not even two yet! My son, on the other hand, will sit (fully clothed, mind you) on his Fisher Price potty and say "pee pee!" But he doesn't get the concept quite yet. The Super Mom, when she surprises you at your house looks around disdainfully because you have a) laundry on the couch and sitting around the couch in laundry baskets (hey! at least it's all clean and semi-folded...Daniel likes to "help" fold laundry) and b) your kitchen still has the dishes from last night and groceries from two days ago (still in their sacks) on the island. You apologize for the mess (WHY??? SHE is the one who surprised you!!) and frantically struggle to clean up. Only then do you realize it's 3:00 in the afternoon, you're still in your pajamas (lucky if the top buttons aren't unbuttoned for easy nursing access for the newborn), and your son is running around in just his pajama top and a diaper (which may or may not be sagging with wetness due to his irritability at being changed). And then you smack your head because she didn't surprise you, you had a playdate arranged....should have written it on the calendar....if only you knew where the calendar was!

Gee, what do I do with all the time I have???? :)

Crying

Does it make me a horrible mother that I cannot stand to hear my children cry? I don't mean like "I can't stand you," but it's more of a "PLEASE don't cry, my heart can't handle it." Zoe is crying right now. She's sick.....she has a cold, and she's running a low grade fever. And she's crying. Did I mention she's crying? I don't know what to do for her. She's not sleeping well at night like she was before, because she is majorly congested. She doesn't want to be anywhere but in my arms right now, and as selfish as this sounds : I have things I need to be doing. My house looks like WW3 took place in it, the armies ate and didn't clean up after themselves, and then proceeded to have a Fisher Price toy battle in our living room. After that, they took the contents out of our dressers and closets and tossed them on our couch. Mean old fighters. So : I need to be cleaning my kitchen, picking up toys, vacuuming and mopping floors, folding laundry, and.....taking down the Christmas Tree. Not to mention, playing with Daniel and feeding Zoe when she's hungry. I feel horribly guilty, and I feel like a bad Mommy because I can't hold her right now. But how do I handle the crying? I can't stand it, it wrenches my heart. And then Daniel will join in.....if he can't stop her, he'll join her.

I'm going insane. And I start school full time in 4 days.....Lord Help Me.

"Everybody Burns The Bacon Sometimes"

That's the title of my autobiography. It pretty much sums up my life. We all have the days where all we want is some crispy, salty, yummy bacon. Crispy being the necessary desire here. But, sometimes in our quest for crispiness, we burn the bacon. I literally burned the bacon fat today. See, I bake the bacon in the oven (start at a cold oven turn it to 400 once you've put the bacon in there) a'la "Alton Brown." It really does crisp up nicely, and if you're like me and tend to burn everything you try to fry, it does it without burning the bacon. The bad thing is when you leave the pan in the oven, and forgetting that it's in there the next day turn your oven on to preheat. That is what happened to me today. So my house smells like burned bacon grease and there's a faint haze hanging in my kitchen. Lovely. My kitchen now looks like the LA Skyline.....oh well, sorry Michael I know how much you abhor the smell of burned grease!

Moral of the story : always look in the oven before you turn it on.

Churches and their scare tactics....

It seems to me that the preaching of some Churches is distinctly designed to "scare" people into Heaven. Is it just me, or is that truly the case? Take the biggie, for example : Original Sin. As I understand it, this is the concept that when we are born we are "stained" by Eve's "Original Sin." Meaning : when a child comes into this world they already have a "mark" on their records. And some Churches preach that unless that child is "saved" immediately, if something were to happen to them they would spend an eternity in hell. This just seems blasphemous to me, somehow. I cannot fathom a God who would condemn a soul, simply for being unfortunate to have been born to the "wrong" family. Because, apparently a baby born to non-believers suffers a worse fate. I can't believe these Churches have members.

Or how about the teaching of Hell? Hell sounds like such a scary place, nobody WANTS to go there right? Is Hell a literal place? The words for "Hell" in the New Testament are translated "sheol" and "Gehenna." So, do we read the words as "sheol," which means "the grave?" Because, yes we all die. Or what about "Gehenna," which was a literal place outside the city that burned eternally? I believe it was a trash pit? I don't know if Hell is a scare tactic or not, but what about the verse that states "every knee shall bow every tongue confess, everything on the earth and under it..." does it not mean literally everything?

Are there scare tactics that certain Churches had while you were growing up? Care to share them? I don't mean to make light of anything here, it just seems to me that some of the teachings seem less from God, and more from man.....and some seem designed as the ultimate "recruiting tools" left over from the Middle Ages. Seems to me that thinking, intelligent, educated adults nowadays would be able to discern what is from God and what isn't. But maybe not?

Tired

I think I've done something to my left foot. It hurts, no matter what I do. The only shoes that are comfortable are the kitten heel open toed shoes Michael gave me for Christmas. They're nice, they're sparkly, and they go with anything....except scrubs. And all I'm going to be wearing for the next year : scrubs. So, I am going to have to adjust and find some shoes that are comfortable on my foot. I wonder if I have a stress fracture? We've gone from carpeted floors to completely hard floors in our house. Maybe my feet aren't used to it yet? Maybe I need to be wearing house shoes.....probably.

The new season of shows is about to start on TV. I can't wait. I love my TV time. I watch at least 1 hour-long drama each night, and some nights I have three shows on! Last night we watched Surface (NBC Mondays at 7 pm) -- it was new, then House (usually on FOX Tuesdays at 8 after Bones!) at 8 because Michael hadn't seen it, then we watched Medium (9pm on NBC Mondays) -- it was new, too! I feel like I got Christmas presents from the networks! I hope Bones is new tonight, because I know House isn't. And there are some new shows starting up, but the only one we'll probably add is American Idol. There's just something about it, you can't help but watch.

I have to take the Christmas Tree down tonight, I guess. I hate to, but we need the space to fit all of Daniel's toys. I can't get my house clean because of all the toys. But taking the tree down seems like the final straw on the back of Christmas....it's joined Christmases PAST, and is no longer Christmas PRESENT....now I look forward to Christmas FUTURE, and a brighter, more financially secure future for myself and my kids. It'll all be worth it, in the end.